Friday, December 25, 2009

Love me alone!

Merry Christmas
I know there are people around you who catch your eye
But they are like passing breeze and they will pass by.

I know you have always felt whatever I had to say,
My dearest, I’ll be here forever; I am here only to stay.

I could have got a better girl, but I could not have gotten you then
I never wanted the world; I just wanted to be your only friend.

I realize it cannot always be me, for there are lots more you see
All that glitters is no gold; and the gold you have is all me.

I will be here with you when all that you like would be gone
You’ll hear me saying evermore, “Love me, like me, befriend me alone!”


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Friday, December 4, 2009

Nothing else...

Nothing else I can say
If you want it to be this way
I'll keep mum and not talk to you
Just want to know, that you'll stay!

In this world so big
I've got none for me
I know it for sure that
God's got plan for me

So I walk alone, if I have to
Knowing you are there, somewhere...
But if this what, I am supposed to do,
I'll just want to know you will stay.


I know you are far
But wherever you are
I will reach you someday
And when we meet
It will be a real good treat
I know its coming our way!

So I walk along the night sky
The rivers stale, boats rowing by
I look above and smile within
For I know, you will come soon and forever stay!

Continue reading...

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

There you go



There you go
And you go again
Away from me…

Is there a way to show
Show you my heart
Throbs for thee…

I know you wont care
If I’m not there
Waiting for you when you return
But love, is it fair
To leave me here
As my love you spurn!

Alright, you may go
And not come back
But, I will stay…

I’ll still wait here
And I’ll love you
Always, anyway…

Well, this can be another song. I am not sure who is going to put music to this, but I am sure it has the caliber to become a song someday – yes, someday!

Happy AIDS Awareness day :)


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Friday, November 13, 2009

Girl in the rain



There’s a girl in the rain
Hiding tears and her pain
I keep wondering
Who’s she?

Her hair is wet
She looks so great
I wish we’d met
Before.

She looks here and there
With eyes full of scare
There’s none around her
She’s alone.

I see through this glass
The distance between us
There’s a road I can’t pass
It’s jammed.

I can’t see her face
Amidst this menace
It’ll be real disgrace
If she leaves.

As she quiver
I step out of my car
And I walk towards her
In faith.

Seeing me come her way
She smiles at me, nay
She hurries away
In the rain.

Why would she just go?
I just want to know
Did she see me before?
Anyways…

There’s a girl in the rain
Hiding tears and her pain
I’ve a feeling within
That’s you!

==================================================
...A dedication to myself and my beautiful wife on 12 years completion of our journey in love...

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Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Even if I let you go


I just want to ask thee
Before you leave me
In all these years we were together,
Did you love me, ever?

It was all clear on your face
You changed a lot these days
Fool of me, that I didn’t see you go away.
My life is at bay!


I knew girls don’t have a heart
I thought you to be poles apart
I fell prey to the dreams you showed,
To the solemn words you vowed.

Love, I know a lot about
But, I still have a little doubt
Is it fate that has parted us, or you?
It is hard to trust, but true!

There was so much in you
I always felt the bliss as new
As you leave me in the world of sorrow,
For a better tomorrow!

Even if I let you go
My love, I just want to know
Were all the words you said just fake?
For God’s sake!


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Sunday, November 1, 2009

One Night Stand



I slept for long, it seems
- As I woke up this morning
- And I stretched my hands for her,
- I found the pillows alone,
- One night stand was over!

I slept for long, it seems
- She woke up before I did
- And she left before dawn,
- I could still hear her moans around me
- Her smell was not yet gone.

I slept for long, I feel
- When I look around my room
- The last night flashed in my head,
- I saw the moon in my arms
- In the comfort of my bed.

I slept for long, I knew
- When I rubbed my eyes and sat up
- And my gaze rummaged around,
- I see my kingdom as it was
- But my queen was not to be found.

I slept for long, I’m afraid
- I found a note, she left
- On a beautiful pink paper, it says
- “Good Morning, my honeycomb,
- “Welcome to the world of AIDS!”



Its just a month left, for the World (anti) AIDS day. This thought came to me while I used to travel from Bangalore to Chennai, in night buses. I used to get both male and female seat-mates and there were instances when I prevented myself from getting carried away. Well, I did that fine, I know. But, the thought remained. Would have written it long ago – but its never so far from where you are … so, here it is!

Cross posted at: The Writers Lounge

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Wednesday, October 7, 2009

The Meeting

I was there in time. The crowd went crazy by the time I reached the Palace Corner. It was almost evening and weekend just started for all the bureaucrats that Friday evening. I stood there near the BSNL gate, with the cigarette half done. She did not come in time. Well, she told me she might be late, but this wait was killing me from inside. I did not want to wait for her that day. I have waited long hours for her to come online and then to login to YM and say that sweet ‘Hi’ and have never complained; but today, when we were meeting for the first time, I could not wait to meet her in flesh and blood! I never liked pink, but I was browsing through the fleeting crowd and searching only for that color that day. She told she will be wearing pink top and white trousers. I saw at least a thousand girls in pink in the last ten minutes of wait, but none of them mattered. When will she come?

A tap on my right shoulder; I turned 180 degrees around and I was shocked!

I always thought her to be my dream girl. We shared our pictures and I really felt she was the one. Actually, I modified her a great deal to match the idol I dreamt of. And very easily, she got into that virtual mold. With her chatting, emails, text messages and rare phone calls and those jokes and giggles over the phone, she easily crept in the cast I made in my thoughts and dreams. I went through the last five months of knowing her on the internet in a flash – the way we met in Orkut and then we chatted in GTalk and those nudges and those irregular emails took us to a few conversations on the phone and finally we would meet that Friday evening. All felt like a moment – a mere moment!

Another prod – this time, it was more of a shake.

“Hey, do you recognize me?”

“Ee… No! I mean, who are you?”

“Err… Rakib?”

“Ra… Rakib?”

“I’m sorry. I meant, are you Rakib Al Sharif?”

“Rakib Al Sharif?”

“I’m Sahana… Sahana?”

“Sahana? Yes, but…”

“I’m sorry again. Are you Rakib? I came here to meet you.”

“Nn… No! I’m not Rakib. My name is Asif. Asif Mm… Mohammad.”

“Oh! I’m extremely sorry.”

“Ee… it’s alright.”

She turned back. I could see the want in her eyes to meet me, through my tainted glasses. She was also searching all around her – for me – the way I was searching for her all this time! She cross passed me and I tried to smell her for one last time by the passing gust of her, but I smelled nothing! How strange! I could smell her and feel her presence even while we were chatting on the internet, the other night. And that day, when she was as close as ever, I could not feel her at all!

She went ahead and dissolved in the crowd. I turned once more to look for her, but I did not search. I did not see her there again. It was almost dark but I could not think of removing the glasses. I lit one more cigarette with almost trembling hands and walked towards the bus stop.

[That Night, in YM]

Sahana: Hi...
Rakib: Hello
(Last message received: 3 minutes ago)
Sahana: hw r u?
(Last message received: 2 minutes ago)
Sahana: Hello... :) u thr?
Rakib: Hi
Sahana: wt happnd?
Rakib: Feeling tired
Sahana: y? :(
(Last message received: 7 minutes ago)
Sahana: ... ...
(Last message received: 4 minutes ago)
Sahana: r u bz?
Rakib: Nope
Sahana: thn? :'(
(Last message received: 3 minutes ago)
Sahana: tk 2 me...
Sahana: r u thr???
Sahana: H E L L O ................. :X
(Last message received: 12 minutes ago)
Rakib: Yes
Sahana: y dint u cm 2day?
(Last message received: 5 minutes ago)
Sahana: wt happnd? tk 2 me... plz....
Sahana: Rakib.......
(Last message received: a minute ago)
Rakib: I am here
(Last message received: 4 minutes ago)
Sahana: ws tht u?
Rakib: No
(Rakib is Offline.)
Sahana: I wsh v cud spk. ........... Gud bye!... ... ... ... ... :'( :'(
(Rakib is Offline. Message not sent.)

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Friday, September 4, 2009

The Last Flood


The flood was bloody. And so was the aftermath. It has been a couple of days, since the silent river rose, roared and ruined the village. The time was frightening and was long lived – enough to engulf the whole village. The life-giving river that used to provide the villagers food and water became a monster that night, and ate up its own children. The tides rose above the banks and swallowed crops, cattle, trees, huts and everything else that beautified and glorified the village.


It left behind Mili alone, the daughter of the village milkman. She was away, at other end of the village, collecting blueberries for the market, next day. She was late and it was raining incessantly; she thought of spending the night with her ailing grandmother. She lived there and she lives to witness the repercussions of the flood that devastated her family, her village and all her dreams overnight!


She remembers the day when she first went to school. Her mother accompanied her till the river. She took a handful of water and sprinkled it all over Mili and asked her to take its blessings, since it was her first steps into a new life. She never knew then that the river would one day, do such grotesque a thing to wipe out the very village that worshipped and considered it their mother.


Mili walked by the bank of the river over the stones and pebbles towards the place where her house used to be, just the other day. She looked up – the moon was like a big aluminum plate, they used to eat on. The river was silent again, but the water in it was rushing downhill like never before. She never saw such haste in the river water. She wanted to ask them where they were going – after sullying her life. They seemed to speed through just to avoid her questions. She cried for the entire day – her tear buds were frozen and out of tears. She cried no more.


She reached the place and looked around – there is no sign of any inhabitance anywhere. Only the vestiges of the mud walls stayed to prove that there were people staying here. She walked among those broken walls and could find nothing but sand and trails of silt and shrubs that the water carried. There was nothing left to cry on or to call home!


It started to rain again. A sudden thought made her cold: is the water hastening to create similar mayhem in the other end of the village, where her grandmother was staying? She got scared! She looked back and ran over the stony riverbank. Her feet bleed but she never stopped but sped as if she was competing with the stream. As soon as she reached grandmother’s hut she ran in and hugged the shivering old woman. She asked, “What happened, Mili? Why did you come back?” Mili whispered in her ears, “Nothing Granny. Everything is all right – everything is silent!”



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Thursday, August 6, 2009

Pawn


Poured love
And left
Won heart
Next deal



As prompted in: Acrostic Only: For the Month of August

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Monday, July 20, 2009

As I left...

As I left

She was standing by the tree

Her big wet eyes staring at me

She tried, but could tell not a word

She looked up, praying to the lord

And I left


As I left

The road cried as I stepped on it

The clouds rumbled as I took the street

The air whistled through the bamboo woods

I walked past, as my mind broods

And I left


As I left

The moon hid behind the cloud

The lark screamed pretty aloud

The drops of tears left her eyes

As she looked up into the skies

And I left


As I left

Something broke in me, deep inside

As I leave alone my newlywed bride

I wanted to too, but I did not cry

But she did, as she bid me goodbye

And I left for the border – as my motherland calls for me…


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Wednesday, June 24, 2009

God All Mighty




Outside my window
I see the road
Carrying people and vehicles,
The road stays still
It never moves
Though it takes people to places.

An oldie clad in rag
All alone, fearful
Waiting to cross the road,
Nobody stopped for him
Resolute, unnoticed,
Waiting for a change in bode.

A child came toddling
From utter nowhere
Held his hand and took him over,
He bowed down
To kiss her chicks
Perhaps, he won’t forget that ever!

They never saw me
Looking at them
I was pleased, as the wind veered
The man turned
To his own destination
A blink and the child disappeared!

I could believe it not
I could not trust my eyes
All seemed to be so beyond belief,
I looked above
Deep, into the clouds
The clear sky brought so much relief!

I know God
That you are there
Overseeing us from all above,
Healing our souls
Easing our lives
And spreading incessant care and love!




Thank You God – for everything!

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Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Catch Me If You Can




Can’t stop
A wafting draft
Transient mood
Creeping fear
Hurrying time

My mind so fresh
Eternal strong

Inexorably, I will fly
Far away from you

You can never seize
One incredible mind
Unfettered soul

Coruscate world wide
Abnegate truth, you may
Nescience you, can’t stop me!


...............................................................................
Written For: Acrostic Only : Prompts for May 30th (Catch Me If You Can)

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Sunday, May 31, 2009

Let’s bring it out



Let’s bring it out
Whatever is there in our heart’
You need not act any smart
You can say it now

You can say it now
That you love me no more
That you never cared for
It will be all right.

It will be all right
If you walk to me and talk
There’s no need to mock
Let’s bring it out…


Crossposted @ The Writers Lounge on May 20, 2009

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Saturday, May 30, 2009

We excavated Love together




Do you live?
Do you live still?
I do not know
I would never know.


You came into my life like a tempest fierce
Ruffled my verve and you went away
And never have you returned to see my tears
Not even to check, if I breathe still!

I miss you
I miss you always.
Do you live to miss me?
I would never know.


I think of the time, when you were here
In my arms, feeling the warmth of my body
My burly arms secured your restless head
Your tender breasts rested on my chest
Your hair flew over my face and glittered
You slept well all night – I in you and you in me!

Do you recall?
Do you recall the eon
Where we ruled the nights?
I would never know.


Those nights were glossy, shining still
Bright in my heart, somewhere there vigil
The skin rubbed the skin back and forth
The search went deep inside the mysterious
All that toil and that sweat was not in vain
For we excavated love together, deep inside
The smile on your face, the pleasure on mine
Would haunt me every night for as long as I live!

Do you live?
Do you live to miss me?
Do you recall the eon?
I would never know.



Crossposted at The Writers Lounge on May 27, 2009
Picture Source

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Friday, May 29, 2009

Why, do YOU cry?


I cry
I know, but do you know why?
You cry

At times
When you laugh out loud to all
I cry!

Save what?
For you have got nothing left
Don’t lie

If I make
Your skin rubbed against mine
You’d fly

But then
You would never betray me.
You try!

... Why, do YOU cry? ...



Crossposted @ The Writers Lounge on May 20, 2009


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Thursday, May 28, 2009

The only way you know

I want to feel, the way you feel
I want to know who you are
I would love to see through your heart
It’s only that, I don’t care! ...................................Not anymore…


You loved me not, it’s all right
I don’t need love from you, see
No one would love me so, I know
If there is one, it’s me! ...................................Its only me…


I cried a lot; but I’m done now
I don’t cry, for I don’t care anymore
After all, you too, are a girl, and
Betrayal is the only way you know. ...................................The only way…



Crossposted @ The Writers Lounge on May 20, 2009

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Wednesday, May 27, 2009

All I want – is you!




“Hold me close,” this is
All I want to say
All I want to do
All I want – is you!

Give me a chance,
We’ve got odds to leaven
Come on let’s dance
I will take you to heaven
If this is not fine
Then what else can be?
I don’t want nothing
As you can see.

“Give me a chance,” this is
All I want to say
All I want to do
All I want – is you!

I love you,
It’s what I want you to know
We’ve got this moment
Please don’t let it go
If this is not enough
Then what else can be?
I need you to take me in
And set me free.

“I love you,” this is
All I want to say
All I want to do
All I want – is you!


Cross posted @ The Writers Lounge on May 8, 2009

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You Remain


Even when in pain
In the deepest of my heart
You’ll always remain


I had a good time again today in the Lounge, after quite some time. Liked it much. All it has done is to remind me of my olden days in here. And a few words just fell out of my mouth. Reminded me of those eyes – reminded me of those poems, comments and replies – of that eternal comfort! These were those few words.

Cross posted @ The Writers Lounge on May 7, 2009

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Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Liberation (Contest Entry)




Liberty
Inspires
Boundlessness
Eternal
Recess
Alcove of soul
Tranquility
Independence
Oblivious mind
Never bound




Submitted to : Acrostic Only Contest Prompt 1 –Liberation
© May 19, 2009 Tanmoy Das, Bangalore, India


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Thursday, May 14, 2009

तेरे लिए...


अगर तू मुझको पढ़ रही है, तो मुझसे ज्यादा खुश और कोई नहीं... ये महफिल तेरी सजाई हुई है... ये रौशनी तेरी की हुई है, ये आलम तेरा किया हुआ है... तू कहती है मैं भूल जून - तू कहती है मैं पास न आयुं... लेकिन मैं जून भी तो कहाँ जाऊँ? हर गली तेरी घर से होके गुज़रती है... हर रास्ता तेरे रस्ते से जुर जाती है... दिल कहता है के मैं तुझे भरी महफिल में रुसवा कर जाऊँ, और तू कहती है के मैं चुप ही रहूँ... बेबसी, नाकामी और तेरी याद मुझे सोने नहीं देती... मैं भटकता रहता हूँ उन्ही गलियों में, जहाँ से कभी तू गुज़रा करती थी...


तेरे बिन ना जीना है ना मरना,
बिन तेरे ना है एक पग भी चलना

तेरे बिना सुना है आलम सारा,
बीते दिन ना आएंगे लौट के दोबारा

वो बीते दिन क्यों याद आये,
पल पल मुझको तेरी ही याद सताये

शयेद कभी तुझे भी हम याद आयें
तेरे बिन सुनी है मेरी दिलकी वो राहें


Cross posted at: The Writers Lounge on May 6, 2009

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Wednesday, May 13, 2009

All I got...

Continued from Hashan’s Black Poetry : The eternal sleep !!


Love is
All I needed
From you lord and from her
All I got was this lonely grave
And death!


Crossposted at: The Writers Lounge on May 6, 2009


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Tuesday, May 12, 2009

The Writers Lounge



Tantalizing
Heartrending
Experience

Writing and
Reading
Integration of
Truthful
Emotions
Repeatedly
Sensuous

Living through
Omnipresent
Unending
Nights with
Genius
Engaging unknowns




A Dedication to The Writers Lounge

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Sunday, May 10, 2009

Destiny



Deeds you do
Endorse fortune
Seldom its luck
That navigates
In storms of life
No one else, but
You build your fate



Written as Prompted at: Acrostic Only (Destiny)
Cross Posted at: The Writers Lounge!

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Saturday, May 9, 2009

Tagore: A Commemoration


There is no Sun as bright as you
You are still radiant in my heart,
Of all I read and of all I know
You are THE MASTER of the art.

Vibrant are all your paintings
The words you wrote are still alive
The wealth you gave to the world
No one else could ever contrive.

Bless me now, I’m all yours
I feel so proud when I think of you,
The world of art will surely miss
Guru of literature, O Kabiguru!

It’s today, when you were born
O what an auspicious day!
I remember you, we all will do
Every poet, wherever be one may.

.-=~(@)~=-.
…Bless us all, Gurudev
…May God keep your soul in Peace…


Visit my Bengali Blog: Hojoborolo for a Bengali Dedication
Cross posted at: The Writers Lounge

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Thursday, May 7, 2009

Liberation (2)



Liberty
Is all I seek
Beleaguered roads
Eternal containments
Recommends freedom
All I get is
Tall dominance
Intolerable restraints
Oh don’t dominate me
Not now – not ever


Written (again) for Acrostic Only : Liberation

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I feel me in you


When I come to you
I see your love on your lips
I hear your heart beats
I FEEL ME IN YOU
I hear your heart beats
I see your love on your lips
When I come to you

...

These are the most B-E-A-Utiful lips I have ever seen... This lady has the best pair!! The poem made me think of her..
Written for: Week Twelve of The NaiSaiKu Challenge

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Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Liberation


Let me be free
In my road ahead
Believe me, its
End of my day
Release and let go
And bind me not
Till I run free
I want to be
On my own way
Not to be caged again

.........===(*)===.........
Written for Acrostic Only : Liberation

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Saturday, May 2, 2009

A Silent Goodbye

“Give me a cigarette.”

“But, you…”

Papiya extended her hand, looking away from Himu. She was still looking at the lake, enveloped in fog. It was a chilled winter morning. The Shivam Lake in Haridashpur is the most famous place for morning walk. People of all age groups come here during this time of the day. Children play in the nearby football ground. Many of the houses were still asleep, along with the marketplace here; but the lakeside was a happening place. A few winter birds which could not avoid the urge to come out of their cozy nests were sitting on the tree above the bench where Himu and Papiya were sitting. They kept the frozen environment alive.


“Here, take it.”

Himu handed her the lighter and a cigarette from his packet. She lit it. He lit one himself. The fog was too dense. They looked deep into the lake, but nothing was visible. The diving board was the only thing they could see, and a few bamboo poles coming out of the water. After that, it was all white. It seems that the lake was taking a nap, wrapped in a white cloak. They tried to see through, but nothing else was visible.

These were the last few days for the couple in Haridashpur. Papiya got transferred to Haridashpur Post Office a couple of years ago and the couple moved in. The township attracted them, the very moment they set foot here. The people were lovely; the environment was so apt for the newly married couple that their whole stay here was like an extended honeymoon. Papiya used to be busy the whole day in her office, while Himu remained busy with his daily chores and writing. It was a perfect place for him to take out the creative genius he had in him. They used to enjoy the evening together, roaming around in Haridashpur – the temple, the river, the mountains and of course the Shivam Lake. They used to walk into the remote places by the mountains or near the river and sit there for hours till the sun would set. They used to enjoy the silence of this place. The rumbling of the river water; the chirping of the unknown species of birds; the sight of the rainbow after an evening drizzle – would set peace in their hearts. In spite of all these, they used to find and enjoy an indescribable silence of this place. Apart from a few honks of a passing train, there was nothing to disturb them. They used to immerse themselves into the quiet of Haridashpur. They would sit on the soft green grass near the river, dipped in ecstasy of their love for each other and the harmony of the nature. She would often keep her head on his lap and would tell her about all that had happened in her office. He would laugh, empathize or keep mum. He would discuss the latest poem he wrote and would tell how the hero of his last story is going to be the villain at the climax. She would enjoy everything he said. A kiss; a hug or long strolls holding each other close was a common phenomenon. This place was not their own, but they got attached so much that the very thought of leaving Haridashpur would bring tears in their eyes.

“It’s getting dark, isn’t it Papu.”

“A few minutes more please.”

“Sure.”

She puffed last her cigarette and threw the bud away. She was angry, somewhere deep down. He was not less annoyed too; but then, there was nothing else they could do. They gave an intense thought to the decision. They thought to let go of Papiya’s job and settle down here permanently. They thought of Himu becoming a full time writer and publish a few books. They thought of borrowing money from her father, until they get well off themselves. Nothing lasted – none of their plans. They had to think of the little Pihu, who was in her second year in school. She had a better future in Kolkata, the happening busy city. Moreover, it was a promotion for Papiya and she was posted in the Head Post Office in the capital city. Not every day do you get such an offer – not every day you get such an opportunity to fix your destiny and brighten your future. They had to leave.

“Let’s go.”

She stood up from the bench, holding his fingers. Her eyes were twinkling and Himu could see the flicker in them, even in this twilight. He stood up too. They were about to leave the place.

“Himu,” she said. “I’ll miss this place.”

They hugged. There were tears in their eyes. None saw that – not even the chirping birds hovering above them.

“I will miss this place too, Papu.”

“Very much,” they said in unison and slowly started walking back to their quarters.

..............................................................................
Written for: Tell a Tale: Prompt # 7 : Silence

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Friday, May 1, 2009

I miss you


I wish too, to have you close to me. I wish too, to dance. The dance floor provokes me; music tempts me; but your absence thwarts me. Only words that I can write; only paintings that I can craft; but I cannot make you appear in front of me.

At times, yes, I miss you.


Post Script: At times, we cannot just say whatever we feel. At times, we cannot just feel our words. A Writer has the advantage to be able to write her/his feelings. Most of us are not equipped enough!

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Thursday, April 30, 2009

I search but find not

I want to follow
The bent curves of your body
To reach the gold spot
I SEARCH BUT FIND NOT
To reach the gold spot
The bent curves of your body
I want to follow


Written For: Week Eleven of The NaiSaiKu Challenge

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Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Wild Is The Wind



Whistling across
Illuminating ruffle
Lightening fast
Devastating at times

Influential flurry
Storms away

Tearing silence
Hollow gust
Ever blowing

When it’s mad
It stops for none
Nor you, nor me
Divulges reality

Written for: Acrostic Only

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Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Confinement



C
losed in a tank
O
nly to fake fun
N
o access to the world
F
unny for morons
I
ncarceration in all
N
ullified mobility
Echoes cruelty of
M
ankind
Entreating freedom
N
ot just awe
T
he fishes in glass tank

Written as prompted in: Acrostic Only

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Sunday, April 26, 2009

Walk with me


O
Girl
Listen
Hold my hand
Think of us as one
And come; walk with me till the end.
Do not think too much
Right or wrong
Love me.
Come
Along.

Written on: April 22, 2009 at: The Writers Lounge.

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Your smell


Your smell
Intoxicates
Lingers after you go
Stays with me when I am alone
Your stench


Written on: April 21, 2009 in The Writers Lounge.

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Saturday, April 25, 2009

Irresistible - Your Bare Skin


My
Love
Asks for
Naked skin
On thy bare body
To touch; to smell; to feel you more
To bring you closer
To my soul
To me
My

Love

This is the Poem along with the censored picture.
I wrote this on April 23, 2009 at: The Writers Lounge.
I removed the poem from there and I am posting it here for you all.

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Irresistible


Here
Are
The Words
I told you
Whenever I held you
Close to my face, close to my heart
Right in to your heart
"I Love you"
It’s true –
Bare
Fair

Written on: April 21, 2009 at: The Writers Lounge.

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Friday, April 24, 2009

The Box Made of Bamboo


I stayed back as Nishi left in her red Maruti. I cannot afford to take a taxi back home. I have to walk till the Bus Stop, which is no nearer than almost a kilometer from the gate of our office.

The rain was problem. The early summer rainy weather in Haridashpur tells a lot about the climate here. However, the cool breeze along with the drizzle was invigorating. Spring does not stay here for long. Summer starts almost as winter ends. That means that the rains came after a good seven or eight months. No, it rained during Durga Puja too. Yes, it did – I am sure of it.

Anyways, I was getting late. The last bus would arrive in – hmm – let me see the watch. Yes, the last bus will arrive in twenty minutes. I need to reach the Bus Stop before that.

I held one end of my Dhoti and jostled it in to the waist knot. I held the other end with the two fingers of my left hand and made an umbrella with my leather handbag and stepped into the puddle. The leather sandals got wet the very moment and declined to walk along any further. I stepped back and came inside the shed. I took the sandals and put them into a plastic carry bag, in which I brought my lunch to office and carefully put them inside the handbag. They went in and there were no more snags. I could walk now.

I stepped back into the muddy road – this time, bare footed. The touch of the mud gave my senses a warning; but, my senses winked and cheered me up. I started to walk. The smell of the rain, the fresh zephyr and the stench of the mud was making me nostalgic.

I went back to my childhood. I remembered how I rescued the 3 kittens from my neighborhood in one such rainy day. I remembered the aftermath too.

I walked briskly, for the Bus Stop was not near. The drizzle got heavier and the small handbag could just get wet along with me. The Kurta was all wet by the time I reached the next corner lane. I will get a good spanking today once I reach home, I knew. This is only the second Kurta I have; the other one I received last year, during my sister’s marriage.

I liked walking in the rain. I would remain here forever, getting wet – getting drenched in these pearls that were dropping from heavens and hitting me like sharp nails. I wished the heavens were not that far away.

But I had to move – and move swiftly. I rushed through a few people and a beautiful girl, whom I would have stopped and gazed otherwise. The deserved that; but not in this rain. I ran.

Just before taking the next left towards the Bus Stop, I saw a small dark boy, not more than twelve years old, sitting in the corner of a big building. He was sitting alone; trying to steal himself away from the ever increasing rain. He was shivering; probably in the cold. I did not have time to look at him, so I moved on.

“Babu…”

He called me? No! That is just an illusion. I took a few steps further.

“O Babu…”

It was him! Calling me at this time, when the rain is wetting me consistently and the next bus arrives in ten minutes now. What the hell!

I asked him what happened. He showed me the small box made of bamboo that he had beneath him. He was sitting on it all the time, protecting it from the rain. Then he showed me the two dots on his left hand – two deep cut marks. I took his hands on mine.

Snake bites! I was sure about it. I have known and seen snakes every week in my house. They used to visit us weekly – regularly for generations. We killed a lot of snakes in our house; perhaps, I myself had killed some ten snakes till now! I know what snakes are and what their venomous bites can do.

His hands were getting blue. He was not dark, but his whole body was now having a bluish tint. He was bitten by a snake and it has been a long time since that! He fell down, on my feet.

*** Three hours later, in Haridashpur Government Hospital ***

“Are you fine, boy?”

He could not open his eyes. They must be too heavy, after the antibiotics that the doctors gave him. I brought him to them just at the right time. The doctors said that the snake must have been low venomous and the poison did not spread in his body too much; however, if it was not for me, he might have gone into a coma!

“Are you fine?”

“Where is my box?” The boys jumped on his bed and shouted at the peak of his voice.

“What box?”

“The box I was sitting on! Where is that box?”

“There, at the corner. I brought it along too.”

“Oh! Thank you Babu, thank you a lot! Thank you for bringing my box along.” There was a clear sign of relief on his face. I could see that.

It was already too late. I called up home and informed them all about the incident and told them that I might have to stay back in the hospital if necessary. They were ok with it, after they heard all the heroics I did today. I was happy for it. The nurses around were smiling at me; the doctors were patting my back for bringing a road ridden boy to the hospital and saving his life – attention, I am so deprived of!

I was also a bit interested to know the story so that I do not leave my friends halfway while telling them the tale of my gallant efforts. I went near him and sat closed to him.

“What happened? How did you get bitten by the snake?”

“I did not get bitten. It was an accident. Shiva had to bite me. He was helpless too.”

“Shiva bit you? Shiva?”

“Yes, Shiva, my snake.”

“Your snake?”

“Yes. I’m the son of a snake charmer. Shiva is my snake, which my father caught a week ago and gifted him to me. I would maintain Shiva and train him for performances. He is my snake.”

“Then why did it bite you?” asked a nurse, awestruck by the story. The other two came and sat near to hear the story.

“I told you. He did not bite me. Father told me to wait for him in the corner of that building and take care of Shiva. He was trying to come out of the box and I tried to put him back in it. He was frightened; so he bit me in self defense. He never wanted to do that. He even does not know that he has poison in his bite!”

“Why did not you call anyone for help?” Somebody asked.

“I could not leave the place myself. Father asked me to stay there. I had to take care of Shiva too. However, I called out to a few other Babus but they did not come to me.”

Everyone in the room was captivated with the story. A few patients lying nearby sat up to take a look at the young snake charmer.

“Bring me my box please, Babu.”

I went and brought the wet bamboo box to him and held it over his lap.

“Where is Shiva now? Did you catch him?”

“Yes, I did! Here he is,” said the boy in excitement and he opened the lid of the box with a jerk.

The snake inside sprang up and the two nurses sitting on the bed sprang up too and fell down. I do not know what happened to the rest who were pouring on to the discussion; for the first thing that Shiva did after he came out of the box was to bite my hand which was still holding the box. I saw pitch darkness all around me.

When I woke up, there were at least 20 people in that Hospital Emergency Room – all looking at me like I was the last Dodo around. A dark big man was standing along with the boy whom I rescued, smiling at me from behind his big fat moustache. I could hardly see his grin; but I smiled back!

“He saved you,” the doctor pointed towards the big man. He added, “he took out all the poison from your hand and I did not have to touch you a bit,” and laughed away.

The big man smiled again. I smiled back at him.

I looked around. Everyone on earth whom I knew, were there in the hospital room. My parents, my sister, my brother in law were there. Even Nishi and Rajan, my colleagues were there too – all staring at me.

I looked at Rajan and raised my eyebrows.

“Three hours,” he said.

I was ashamed. The very thought of my own heroics have faded long ago. I was feeling insecure, shy and diffident in front of everybody. I wanted to go home.

“Are you fine, Babu?” the little boy asked, with the most beautiful smile I have ever seen and holding the box of bamboo with both hands – perhaps it was the closest thing to his heart.


....................................................................................................
Written as prompted on:
Tell a Tale : Week # 6: Snake


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Tuesday, April 21, 2009

You put me in bliss


I want to ask you
Are you the one that I love?
Are you the one, miss?
YOU PUT ME IN BLISS
Are you the one, miss?
Are you the one that I love?
I want to ask you


-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Written for: Week Ten of The NaiSaiKu Challenge

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Mirrors



a - Single Word (an acrostic on Single Word)
M
y own self
In front of me
Reads my mind
Reveals my heart
Omnipresent
Records my breaths
Sizzling truths – naked.



b - One Word Acrostic (an acrostic using one word per line)
M
y
Image
Revealed
Realizations
Obsessions
Retrospections
Sexuality.


c - Double Acrostic (an acrostic ending & beginning with the same letter)
M
irage, I am
I give you an alibi
Revere your power
Real I am, but afar
Original I am. So
Reflections, I concur
Sincerely, I confess.




d - 2 Column Acrostic (an acrostic , two words per line. Each word must begin with the same letter) - Not a 2 Column Acrostic; both the words in the line need to mean same too.

M
irror mine
Images incline
Reveals reality
Rears rapture
Obstinate, overriding
Renowned, reorganized
Senses sagacity


Written for and submitted to: Acrostic Poetry Workshop Blog (Workshop 1)

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Opportunity

Once when I was sleeping
Perhaps in a deep dream
Piercing my ears, my phone rang
One of my friends had called
Rudely, I talked to him
Then put down the phone
Unnoticed, what he wanted to say!
~~
Now, he’s in the moon. And
I’m still dreaming. He called me
To accompany, but I did not listen!
Yes, an opportunity was lost!


.............................................................................................

Wrote this for: Acrostic Only (Opportunity)


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Monday, April 20, 2009

An evening boon!


The day was bad. There was no crowd in the beach that day. I sold only for 6 rupees. The big fat glass bottle of lozenges was still full. I did not know how I would pay the day’s rent of Rs. 10. The rent collector would come soon. It was going to be dark. The sky was painted in all colors – red, white, yellow, orange, grey, blue and black! There was a cool breeze coming from the sea. The birds were chirping. The scantly populated beach was getting more secluded as the few visitors present there were leaving too. I was sad and was preparing myself for a nice thrashing from both my Uncle Abdul and the rent collector, Raghu.

“ए छोकरा, इधर आ” (Hey boy, come here.)

I turned back and looked around. There were not many people around. It was getting dark too, and I could not see anyone. I curved back to my position and looked ahead towards the park, near the beach, hoping for someone to come my way and buy some of my lozenges.

“अबे इधर देख, निचे” (Hey look here, downwards.)

I looked down. A middle aged man, clad in torn jeans and a dark jacket over a bright colored polo shirt was lying down. He was certainly enjoying the cool evening breeze at the sea shore. I was happy to hear the call. Probably, he would buy some lozenges from me. I went to him.

Phew! He smelled like rotten egg. There was a mild smell of country liquor too. I know it because my Uncle Abdul always has it. He goes mad when he drinks. This must be tasty, but then, I don’t know. Everyone says that liquor is not good. They must be having their own reasons; but whatever it is, I never ever tasted that awful thing.

“अबे गधे, सुनाई नहीं देता मैं बुला रहा हूँ?” (You moron! Can’t you hear me calling you?) He said furiously.

“जी साब, बोलिए.” (Yes Sir, tell me) I went to him running; almost tumbling on the uneven hot sand.

“क्या बेचता है तू?” (What do you sell?) He commanded.

“निम्बू लागेंस साबजी.” (Lemon Lozenges, Sir.)

“कितने की है?” (For how much do you sell these?)

“एक रुपिअह में चार, साबजी.” (Four for rupee one, Sir.)

“पानी है?” (Do you have water?)

“पानी?” (Water?) I turned around and looked at the dark sea, behind me. I smiled, “नहीं, साबजी.” (No, Sir.)

“ठीक है. दो लोगेंस दे इधर.” (Ok. Give me two lozenges.)

“मेरे पास छुट्टे नहीं है साब.” (I don’t have change, Sir.) I murmured.

“इधर आ, एक राज़ की बात बताता हूँ.” (Come close, I will tell you a secret.)

As I went near to him, he said with a grin, “मेरे पास भी नहीं है.” (Even I do not have any.) Saying this, he burst into a weird and wicked laughter!

I did not like anything about that man. He had patchy stubble on his face which I did not like. He had a smell of rotten eggs that can be smelled from miles away. He had grown his hair and the way he dressed was weird too. I did not like anything of him. However, I was happy that he called me. I was sure he would buy some lozenges; but, now he was asking them for free? I will not give any even if he threatens to kill me.

“क्या हुआ? नहीं देगा?” (What happened? Won’t you give me any?)

I looked at him. His dark face was barely visible; more so, because he was lying down on the hot sand. I did not reply to him. I held the glass bottle closer to my chest, with both my arms around it. Probably, he saw that and he started laughing again. This time, it was even louder.

“इधर आके बेठ. अजा मेरे पास.” (Come here and sit. Come to me.) He said suddenly.

I did not move.

“अब आजा नहीं तो बहोत मरूँगा.” (Now, come here or else you will have it from me.)

I was not particularly scared; but then, I just did not want to offend him too. I went near and sat there, beside him. He was stinking! For the first time I saw his eyes. His eyes were very much different from his outlook. They were dreamy, half opened; probably because he was drunk, or maybe not. There was a soft feeling in his big brown eyes that twinkled in the dark evening at the beach. The first look in his eyes reminded me of Radhika, the daughter of the sweetmeat seller in my colony. I just fell in love with his eyes and there was a sudden feeling of attachment. I wanted to ask him something I do not know; but his smell kept me away.

He has had enough of that creepy laughter and was almost calm now. He did not detect me noticing him. He was looking down and was silent for some time – perhaps he was trying to accumulate himself to talk further. Suddenly, he looked up.

“तो, मैं पैसा नहीं दूंगा तो मुझे तू लोगेंस नहीं देगा?” (So, you will not give me any lozenge if I do not pay you, isn’t it?)

I took a deep breath and gathered some strength in my voice, “नहीं दूंगा!” (I will not!)

“हम्म… अभी भी नहीं?” (Hmm… not even now?) He took out a revolver from his belt and held it in front of my face. I was freaking stunned and scared seeing the gun in his hand. I went pale. I must have been visible even in the dark now. I could feel my hands shivering!

He exploded again! This time he was laughing so aloud that a few passerbies looked at us. No one saw the gun as it was hidden in the dark; but they wondered a lot, about this curious and strange laughter in the middle of the beach. It took me time to stabilize him. Suddenly he looked up at me.

“अगर तू मुझे दो लोगेंस देगा तो मैं तुझे मेरा एक लोगेंस दूंगा.” (If you give me two lozenges of yours, I will give you one of mine.)

I did not like it. First of all, he was going to exchange one of his lozenges for two of mine – a bad business. Secondly, I need to have money in exchange of my lozenges; I can give his lozenge neither to Uncle Abdul nor to Raghu. I did not like this idea.

His eyes must have done some trick on me. I did not think any further and took out two lemon lozenges carefully and handed over to him. I did not want his lozenge. He can keep it. I will handle the situation myself. I was not afraid of his gun! He asked for water, which I could not offer him. That was my duty, but then I had lozenges, which I can give. That’s fine then! I tried to console myself and justify the act.

He took the two lozenges and popped them in his mouth. I could hear him chew them first and then bite and break them into pieces. I felt a jolt in my heart when my lozenges were crushed brutally between his filthy teeth.

It was dark now and I wanted to leave. Raghu was not here as yet and I was happy. I thought to tackle him the next day, somehow.

“मैं चलता हूँ साब.” (I’m leaving Sir.) I said that and I prepared to stand up. He was searching his pockets as he noticed me leaving.

“मुझे आपका लोगेंस नहीं चाहिए.” (I don’t want your lozenge.) I declared.

He looked up at me, still lying on his one arm.

“नाम क्या है रे तेरा?” (What is your name?)

“अहमेद.” (Ahmed.)

“मतलब क्या है?” (What is the meaning?)

“पता नहीं साब.” (I don’t know Sir.) I was almost irate.

He extended his left arm and opened his fist over my palm. There was sparkling white piece of stone.

“क्या है ये?” (What is this?)

“मेरावाला लोगेंस.” (My lozenge.)

“लेकिन मुझे ये चाहिए नहीं…” (But, I don’t want this.) I tried to return him the same. He held my closed fist with both his hands and stood up.

“लेके जा. कभी याद करेगा मुझे.” (Take it. You will remember me sometime.) He said this, turned back and struggled through the sand and went away. He was lost in the dark within moments. I stood there for a few more minutes, holding the stone in my hand with all the strength I had. I did not want to lose it and I did not want to share it with anyone else. I knew what stone it was!

~: Six Years Later :~

Here I am today, writing about the evening that changed my life. The man I met on that evening was no less than an angel to me. He gave me a boon, in exchange of two lemon lozenges. And by virtue of that, I’m sitting in the 80th floor of the tallest building in Mumbai. It’s my own floor! I own a fully fledged business now. I have my own house and my own car. I need not sell lozenges after that evening. My days with Uncle Abdul were over. I never fought with Raghu again – I never had to. The evening brought me a godsend. The only thing that haunts me now, is the identity of the man, the seraph. Probably, I will never get to know who he was.

..................................................................
Written as prompted on: Tell a Tale (Week # 5: An Evening)

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Saturday, April 18, 2009

Winter


Winter
A freezing Day
Snow filled the crowded streets
It shines bright, as dazzling marble
All white.


......................................................................................
Learnt Cinquain form of poetry from Pratibha at:
Crossposted at: The Writers Lounge on April 11, 2009

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Friday, April 17, 2009

Please don’t go


Don’t
Go.
Not now.
Not after
You made me love you.
For, I would always miss you too.
If you go away
Tell me how
Would I
Live,
Love?

......................................................................................................
Learnt this form of poetry at: Of something 'n' Everything
Also posted at: The Writers Lounge
Syllable Count: 1-1-2-3-5-8-5-3-2-1-1

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Mistake: A scary reason

~1~

It was a hard fight. Once more. They have been married for two years now and Alex could not remember a single day when they did not fight. Every time they fight, it would end up in a quarrel and they would not talk for hour or even days! They fought again today. It was grave this time. Julie cursed him as much as she could and locked herself in the other room. She threatened to commit suicide, but Alex knew she would not dare to do so. She would come out in some time and everything will be in place. However, it was almost an hour that she has locked herself and has not uttered a single word since. It was scary, but he knew she would come back. He tried to think about the good times they spent together. The honeymoon in Geneva; the trip to Paris, a year ago; the last Christmas! Those were dream time.

He made himself a peg of scotch. He opened the bottle last week when Joanna and George paid them a visit. Alex liked the bottle more because of the long neck. It feels like long legs of the ladies he use to date – smooth and flawless! He took the first sip. It was awesome. The smell itself is worth the money he spent to buy the bottle. Julie liked it that time. He was missing her all right, but never would he go and call her. Why should he? It was not his fault today. He could not see the ego taking over his love for her.

He finished the bottle and puffed the last cigarette he had. The clock ticked two. What? It was 2 o’clock! And Julie was still locked inside her room! He unlocked his door and walked to her door.

“Julie.” There was no response. Probably she was asleep.

“Julie.” He called her loudly. There was no response still. He called a few more times, but nobody answered. He was anxious for a moment. He tried to look in through the keyhole. The sight inside was blurry, but it was clear that there was a mishap. Julie was lying on her bed and her limbs were swinging outside, as if she was falling down from the bed.


Alex shouted, “Julie. Don’t you dare play any prank on me! Come out, you moron. It’s too late now. I’m hungry.” There was still, no response.

Alex was worried now. He banged the door a couple of times and the latches gave away. He broke in and ran to her and perched by her side. She was lying still. A white froth came out of her mouth. Alex checked her breath and her nerves, but could not find any. She was no more! He stood up in fright. There was a piece of paper on the bed with the following scribbled in:

“Al, my love, I’m leaving you. I’m going to some place where I can be happy and I need not answer to your filthy questions. Our marriage is dead. By the time you read this, you will realize that I’m dead too. I never mistook you for any wrong reasons and I’ve given you all the proofs you wanted to prove my sanity. We have spent all dreadful time together. I thought everything will be all right; but you never cared for my sacrifices and you were always a coward to admit those. I have nowhere else to go, apart from where I’m leaving to. I know you will not be sad and I hold you solely responsible for my act. Goodbye, Al!”

He was afraid now. He could not move; neither could he stand up. He was shivering – more in fear; less in sorrow. Suicide – police – court – judge – sentence – jail! All ran through his mind in a single moment. He probably could hear the siren of a patrolling police car. His face went pallid. He accumulated all his strength and stood up. He looked back at her for once and ran out of the room. He banged his door behind him and threw himself on his bed.

~2~

After a few minutes, Alex opened his eyes.

Oh! What a dream! Was it? No! His door was open and the dead face of his wife was so very vivid to him; it cannot be a dream. He looked around carefully; her door was closed, his hands were still shivering and his heart beating faster, as if he has came running there. It is so real; it can be, but a dream! His wife was dead. And he was responsible for it. It was a suicide and the suicide note clearly mentions that he was accountable for it. Now, there will be police in his house in no time. He cannot escape the long hands of the law and soon he will be trialed and sentenced, probably with a capital punishment for inducing Julie to kill herself. Everyone in the society will know about it and everyone in Illinois will know once the news gets published in the morning paper. His friends, his colleagues and his long forgotten family members will come to know very soon and will spit at him. He almost cured his bad impression, but now, nobody will listen to him and nobody will spare him. None will be interested to listen to his reasons and all will abandon him. There will be no life, even if the jury spares him. There will be no Alex Graham Fox anymore.

Blood was all over his mind – the heart was beating fastest – the head was spinning; probably because of the alcohol inside, and more so with the fear of losing everything. He looked at the empty bottle of scotch. It was lying on the table. It allured him, somehow. He left the bed and held the bottle by its long neck and hit it on the brink of the table. There was a clatter of glass pieces flying around him and hitting the marble floor. The sharp edges of the broken bottle were chilling to look at.

Blood jetted out of his wrist, as he slit it with the broken bottle in his hand. Within a few seconds there was a pool of blood around him. He stared at his severed wrist. The veins were open and the blood streamed out like dammed water out of a sluice gate. As time passed, he felt weaker and hapless. He held his arm with the other hand and sat there in the puddle of blood. Alex could never know when his eyes closed and when he fell unconscious. But seconds before he lost vision, he could see in the wall clock. The time was exactly 1 o’clock! He instantly realized everything, but could not react before falling out cold.

~3~

The wall clock timed 2 AM. The distant church bells rang twice.

The other door knob rotated and the door flung open. Julie came out of her room. Her eyes were already pink; having cried for long hours now. She was feeling hungry too and knew Alex would feel the same. She thought that they can talk over the dinner and settle things, like always. She wanted to forgive Alex for every mistake of his – once more. She was certain to be able to resolve this issue and move on. She came near his door and peeped inside. The sight was bloodcurdling!

“Al, my dear!” she screamed and ran to him. She took his head and put it on her lap and burst into tears. She anticipated nothing of this sort and she was almost broken. The body of her husband lied in front of her, almost lifeless.

~4~

It was 5 AM now or the wall clock in the St. Joseph’s nursing home was running slow. Julie sat in one of the benches near the Operation Theatre, holding her head with both her hands. The hands were still stained in blood. She wished not to look back at the world again. She held herself guilty for all the tragedy that was brought into her life in the last few hours. She just wanted to die.

“Mrs. Fox, he is out of danger now. You can meet him in some time, once the nurses finish up.” The doctor said calmly, coming out of the Operation Theatre and wiping his hands. She looked up, for the first time in some time. Her eyes found a reason to glitter again. She wanted to thank the doctor, but then she almost lost the strength to speak.

“By the way, Mrs. Fox,” the doctor added, “Inspector Smith wants to see you for a moment. He is waiting at the reception downstairs. Take care of yourself.”

Her voice was sinking. She needed attention herself; but the thought of getting her husband back was strong enough to hold her upright. She was worried that the police will interrogate her, but then she was stronger now than ever before.

“Thanks doctor,” said Julie.
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Prompted at:
1. ABC Wednesday Round 4: M for Mistake
2. Sunday Scribbling #158: Scary
3. Three Words Wednesday: 3WW CXXXIII (Allure, Perch, Vivid)
4. April 14th edition of Heads Or Tails! Week #86: HEADS - "Reason"


Thanks to all the blogs for prompting so wonderfully!

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