Thursday, March 12, 2009

I will move on


My years of passion
That I spent writing for you
Have cajoled spirit
To go on devoid of you.

Of years reclusive,
Nothing again I would talk
Even if you ask
With you love, I may not balk.

Loving the same you
Being with the same old clique
But it hurts a lot
When you want to but can’t speak.

I dealt with all that
But I lost to your temper
You asked me to love
But then, I failed to concur
May be I am still a cur.
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Written for 3WW CXXVIII (Cajole, Recluse, Temper)
Tried to follow Choka here; however, the length of the poem may be a concern here.

9 comments:

  1. Tan, thanks for coming by 3WW and having a go at the words. I am unfamiliar with Choka, but I did read up on it and I tend to think you are OK with teh length. I like this very much.

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  2. I've never heard of Choka before so I've learned something new today. Great use of the words. I love the closing stanza.

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  3. I enjoyed this...add me to the list of those who haven't heard of Choka. I'll have to investigate it further!

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  4. I don't know about Choka either, but enjoyed the poem.

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  5. For some1 who said he couldn't write when words were given, you wrote DAMN well! Brilliant!

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  6. Tan, i dont know the special styles of poetry.. but i just love ur poems, and this one must have been a lot of work, have turned out beautifully again..well done..

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  7. The anguish is beautifully woven here..the tittle conquers..

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  8. a very positive thought....
    nice one tan.

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  9. First of all mates, who ever wants to know about Choka, can use this link from The Writers Lounge. If you find this as a way to promote our group blog, then ... well, it is :P

    but I'm sure you will get all the information you want from there.

    @ ThomG

    Thanks for your visit and the comment. That was wonderful ... The Choka is normally from 30 to 100 lines long .. so, the concern!


    @ Ofira

    Thanks thanks and thanks again ... your words do mean a lot ... do visit and read me more :)


    @ Feldging Poet

    Use the link above mate, it has the information about Choka ... thanks for liking the poem :)


    @ Angel

    Thanks for the visit ... I'm happy that you liked it ... Keep visiting and reading me more ... Cheers!!


    @ Rashi

    Hehehe... thanks ;) Just tried ...


    @ Anonymous

    You are correct - it was a lot of toil indeed. And to Rashi too: see, people could understand that I had to really work for it. I had to, for it was not that free flowing ... got it? hehehe ...

    Will do better next time mate ... thanks :)


    @ Megha

    Thanks a bunch for visiting and commenting ... Happy to see you liked it ...


    @ Nitu

    I'm glad that you found something positive here ... hehe ... that was nice :) HBD ...


    I'm trying to experiement with words these days and all these are in the same spirit ... Let me know if I can help you anyways ... Cheers!!

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Thanks for reading me and choosing to comment. Your comment always encourages me to write more and write sense. Keep visiting, whenever you can and comment on the posts. I will be more than eager to receive your comments and suggestions.

Warm Regards,
Tan :)

PS: Please visit my other blog: Thus Spake Tan!